Wanna-be’s

Wanna-be’s

With his new girlfriend – a soccer mom with a taste for bondage – urging him to “go condo,” failed screenwriter Winfield Payton needs cash. Accepting a job offer from a college friend, he becomes the lone white employee of a black S&L. As the firm’s token white, he poses as a Mafioso to intimidate skittish investors and woos a wealthy cougar to keep the firm afloat. Figure-skating between the worlds of white and black, gay and straight, male and female, Jew and Gentile, Yuppie and militant, Payton flies higher and higher until the inevitable crash… $1.99 on Kindle.

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Free: 9 Lovers for Emily Spankhammer

Free: 9 Lovers for Emily Spankhammer

Spectacular southern belle Emily Spankhammer is driven by love and the dubious advice of Sparkle, her mostly invisible pink unicorn spirit guide, into a quest for romance. But with Sparkle more interested in his own deranged bucket list, and men as reliable as a 1971 1.6L Ford Pinto Runabout hatchback, what could possibly go wrong? Circus performers, billionaires, detectives, and a menagerie of wild animals; Emily and Sparkle work their way through the available talent like two raccoons through a picnic hamper. Doing for romance what Spinal Tap did for progressive rock, “9 Lovers for Emily Spankhammer” has rewritten the romance novel one cliché at a time and left it noticeably unhinged. Free on Kindle.

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Help for Hysterical Humans Who Hope to Be Happy in Heaven or Here

Help for Hysterical Humans Who Hope to Be Happy in Heaven or Here

Savor a delectable collection of recipes for making merry in one minute or many. Often shameless, sincere, and sublime at the same time, this vivacious volume of verse distills and delivers the best of James’s efforts to examine, enjoy, and enhance for new friends the adventure of human existence. Help for Hysterical Humans earns its adjectives and inspires its readers to add a few more. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Ginger the Gangster Cat

Ginger the Gangster Cat

When fat, scruffy Ginger teams up with innocent little Sparky, it’s a recipe for fun and laughter as the two cats travel from London to Spain. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Boots and Bones

Boots and Bones

YOU’LL LAUGH. YOU’LL CRINGE. YOU’LL WANT MORE! For the first time ever, all three of Ann Charles’ bestselling, award-winning first books from her multiple mystery series are available for a discounted price in one boxed set. Grab your “startle” kit now and see why so many readers are raving about Ann’s laugh-out-loud humor, spicy romance, and suspense-filled adventures between the covers. $3.99 on Kindle.

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Why People Suck

Why People Suck
You’ve heard of Sigmund Freud. You’ve heard of Carl Jung. But have you heard of Abe Surde? Surde is a humorist and master mixologist who tackles–with a smile and a wink–one hundred commonly irritating, upsetting, and obnoxious personality types seen in everyday life.

From disconcerting creeps to loudmouth louts and worrisome weirdos, Surde shares with readers his channeled theories on the origins of bad behavior. His assemblage of wacky yet clever musings combined in a quasi-serious and silly way adds levity to a world gone mad.

His profound quest to understand why people suck results in a collection of nonsensical reasoning that amuses while simultaneously serving small kernels of truth that surprisingly hit the mark.

This book of “divine” insight is one of those guilty pleasures that tickle your funny bone unexpectedly.

The paperback version of WHY PEOPLE SUCK is a great icebreaker for parties and a fun distraction for anyone disturbed by the actions of another. It’s also a great gift for someone who needs a little hint.

Note of warning for delicate readers: the book contains adult language, references to sex and drugs, but only minimally to rock and roll. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Sex Hell

Sex Hell

When Debbie de La Fontaine tries to spice up her love life by supernaturally tampering with her sex life, she is cursed to spend every future encounter in a magical place called “Sex Hell,” where the sex is ludicrous and amazing but the romance is scarce. Her only chance for escape is through the stingy clues supplied by an obnoxious demon, and the only way to obtain the clues is by returning to Sex Hell again and again to have outrageous sexcapades with the man she most wants to avoid—or does she? Sex Hell is an absurd comic fantasy about the confusion of relationships. How is love related to sex, and how is sex related to love—and do love and sex need to be related at all? $0.99 on Kindle.

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Free: Lady Justice and the Ghost Whisperer

Free: Lady Justice and the Ghost Whisperer

The perfect ghost story for the upcoming Halloween season. What do a Confederate soldier who died on the field of battle, a woman who was driven from her home by the ravages of the Civil War, and a man who perished in a turn-of-the-century asylum have in common? They all contact private investigator, Walt Williams. A bizarre series of events surrounding these paranormal visits culminate in the discovery of a terrorist plot to detonate bombs at a crowded festival. Once again, Lady Justice pairs Walt with forces from beyond the veil to solve mysteries hidden for decades and bring evil-doers to justice. Free on Kindle. 

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Didn’t Get Frazzled

Didn’t Get Frazzled

A rousing, comic novel about four years in the life of an intrepid young medical student, set in the grueling world of an elite NYC medical school. Medical student Seth Levine encounters a student so arrogant he boasts that he’ll eat any cadaver part he can’t name, an instructor so dedicated she tests the student’s ability to perform a gynecological exam on herself, and a woman so captivating that Seth will do whatever it takes to make her laugh, including regale her with a story about a diagnostic squabble over an erection. Didn’t Get Frazzled captures with distressing accuracy the gauntlet idealistic college grads must face to secure an MD and, against the odds, come out of it a better human being. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Deverell’s Obsession

Deverell’s Obsession
A Regency-set historical romance… Sometimes the worst of circumstances can have the best results. It’s certainly true for Miss Léonie Girard, whose missing memory might hold the answers to some dangerous puzzles. Delaney Deverell doesn’t know that yet; he’s still stunned that the portrait on his wall has come to life…and she is staying in his house. $0.99 on Kindle.

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The Accidental Art Thief

The Accidental Art Thief
For a quarter of a century forty-five-year-old Zinc has worked as a caretaker for a wealthy old man, living in a small casita on his ranch in New Mexico. She doesn’t make much money, but she has the old man, her dogs, and gorgeous views of the mountains. She is basically a very content recluse who doesn’t invest much time thinking about what she might do if her circumstances change. So when the old man dies suddenly, and his daughter all but throws her off the property, Zinc is forced to reinvent herself—and quickly. $1.99 on Kindle.

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Toy Story

Toy Story
Toys aren’t just for the kiddies anymore – they’re learning tools for everyone. Just ask Dana, who sells the grown up versions, and gets more than an extra income from the experience. $0.99 on Kindle.

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When Angels Fall

When Angels Fall
Danielle Coulter had never believed in anything except her mother, hard work and heartache. She never had time for religious fairytales. But when her mother died, Dani was forced to believe…or die.

Not only was she forced to accept that God and Lucifer are real, but also that she is the last living descent of God on Earth. An undeniable fact when the Archangel Gabriel fell to Earth to protect her.

Archangel Gabriel; banished from Heaven over four million years ago for refusing to kill his brother, Lucifer, was about to get a second chance to re-enter Heaven. He was sent to Earth on a mission from his Father to protect the last Daughter of God; the last woman to carry the Blood of God on Earth, and kill his brother, once and for all.
Gabriel had never expected to feel anything for Dani, but he soon found himself willing to fight Heaven and Hell to keep her safe, even if it meant his own destruction. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Free: Only in Vegas

Free: Only in Vegas
Being Italian and being sexy is supposed to go hand in hand, but somewhere along the line twenty-six-year-old Angelina Rossi’s genes forgot their Italian love goddess heritage. Thirty-year-old business executive Trey Landers isn’t surprised by much his best friend and neighbor, Angelina Rossi, throws his way. But this time she throws him one hell of a curve ball. Pretending to be her lover in front of her ex-boyfriend in Las Vegas awakens unexpected desires in them both and soon the lines of friendship and newfound love begin to blur. If only what happens in Vegas didn’t have to stay there. Free on Kindle.

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Free: The Chemtrail Conspiracy Set (Mystery)

Free: The Chemtrail Conspiracy Set (Mystery)
Are we being poisoned?

Those fluffy white trails crisscrossing the sky–some say they are simply water vapor frozen into crystals. Others say they are deadly chemicals, some of which are for military defense, and others to control the weather and the world’s food supply. Free on Kindle.

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Pianist in a Bordello

Pianist in a Bordello
What would happen if a politician decided to tell the truth—the whole truth?

Richard Youngblood, aspiring Congressman, is about to find out. He’s running on a platform of honesty and transparency—and against the advice of his friends and advisers he’s decided to start with himself. His autobiography will lay his entire life bare before voters just days before the election.
And what a life he’s had. Born in a commune and named Richard Milhous Nixon Youngblood as an angry shot at his absent father, Richard grows up in the spotlight, the son of an enigmatic fugitive and the grandson of a Republican senator. He’s kidnapped and rescued, kicked out of college for a prank involving turkeys, arrested in Hawaii while trying to deliver secrets to the CIA…Dick Nixon Youngblood’s ready to tell all.

He’ll even tell his readers about the Amandas—three women who share a name but not much else, and who each have helped shape and define the man he’s become.

Are voters really ready for the whole truth?

Are you?

Pianist in a Bordello is a hilarious political romp through the last four decades of American history, from a narrator who is full of surprises. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Contact Us: A Jake Corby Sci-Fi Thriller

Contact Us: A Jake Corby Sci-Fi Thriller
On May 22, 2018, every person on Earth sneezes. Simultaneously.

Hours later, an alien spacecraft appears over New York and broadcasts a dire message of impending doom. The future of the human race will depend on the whims of a solitary extraterrestrial who appears in the form of Walter Cronkite. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Better Date than Never Boxed Set

Better Date than Never Boxed Set (Books 7-10)
This boxed set includes four contemporary romance books from the USA Today Bestselling Better Date than Never series. Each story is filled with humor, friendship, and the dating trials that come with finding true love. $0.99 on Kindle.

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The Adventures of George (Satire)

The Adventures of George
The Adventures of George is a satirical and humorous look at recent events, international affairs, national leaders and celebrities. The characters, both named and unnamed have similarities to real people, both alive and dead and, thus, the reader will meet our hero George, The Mere Leader, the Bearded One, Mustafa bin Maden, Elvester, Didi Damin, Borrock Sobama, and more. In the story, George has adventures with all of these people, some of whom are friends and some of whom are foes.

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Magic Times

Magic Times
Everybody wants a little magic!

A young man not overly burdened with brains hitchhikes to Ohio in search of his runaway girlfriend, but he finds a lot more than he’s looking for. Soon Jason is chin-deep in a bizarre and perilous predicament involving a witch, a crippled magician, a sinister businessman, a mysterious stalker, and a book of magic that could bring about the end of the world.

Harvey Click, best known for his lurid horror tales, explores a different genre with this darkly comic coming-of-age novel. He mixes a tablespoon of black magic with a teaspoon of zesty sex, a sprinkle of savory satire, a dash of dire danger, a splash of spicy suspense, a pinch of pungent irony, a cup of coarsely ground comedy, and a full measure of sheer madness. $0.99 on Kindle.

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Free: Lady Justice and the Conspiracy

Lady Justice and the Conspiracy
Are we being poisoned? Those fluffy white trails crisscrossing the sky — some say they are simply water vapor frozen into crystals. Others say they are deadly chemicals, some of which are for military defense, and others to control the weather and the world’s food supply.

Are the chemtrails really part of a clandestine government conspiracy? Four people believe so, and claim they have proof, but each of their lives comes to a tragic and mysterious end before they can offer their proof to the world.

Join Private Investigator, Walt Williams, as he searches for the truth and looks for clues to explain the untimely deaths. Free on Kindle.

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FREE: ONLY IN VEGAS

ONLY IN VEGAS
Being Italian and being sexy is supposed to go hand in hand, but somewhere along the line twenty-six-year-old Angelina Rossi’s genes forgot their Italian love goddess heritage. And now everyone at her work knows what a failure she is as a woman thanks to her ex-boyfriend and co-worker at Sunset Travel who has given Angie the nickname of ‘Ice Princess’, claiming no man will ever thaw her.

Thirty-year-old business executive Trey Landers isn’t surprised by much his best friend and neighbor, Angelina Rossi, throws his way. But this time she throws him one hell of a curve ball. She not only wants him to accompany her on a business trip to Las Vegas, pretending to be her lover in front of her ex-boyfriend, she wants Trey to give her pointers on what it takes to seduce a man.

A man of his word, Trey’s fevered kisses in front of her ex has the ass regretting his decision to break up with Angie. Not that she’d ever consider going back to Rick. Especially after discovering true passion in Trey’s arms. With that passion comes the realization they’re no longer pretending as the lines of their longstanding friendship and newfound love begin to blur. If only what happened didn’t have to stay in Vegas.

Or does it? Free on Kindle.

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FREE: HOOKED ON YOU

HOOKED ON YOU
When Shay McDaniels learns that her father has been receiving threatening letters she heads down to his resort in the Keys. Frustratingly, he refuses to call the police, determined to handle matters on his own.

Private investigator Chase Reynolds has no idea the woman he meets on the beach, the one whose son is determined to ‘catch his mommy a man’, is James Lansing’s daughter. James had assured him that his daughter was safely away in Miami. So when he sees the woman he’d met on the beach talking to James, even hugging him, Chase regretfully moves her to the top of his suspect list.

 

Humor…Romance…A touch of suspense…A story to warm your heart and make you laugh! Free on Kindle.

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Off the Reservation

Off the Reservation
An uproarious comic novel that explores modern presidential politics and whether honesty can find a place within it, Off the Reservation will keep you laughing throughout. When Congressman Evan Gorgoni of Indiana, fed up with Washington, retires from Congress, he does so with such stunning honesty that he is drafted to run for president. If he’s going to do it, he’s going to do it as no one has done it before… $0.99 on Kindle.

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The Whole Beast

The Whole Beast
On a drizzly February afternoon in the Pacific Northwest a local news crew stepped into a small patch of woods to film a story on truffle hunting. It wasn’t long before they realized they were not alone.

To be held responsible for the discovery of Bigfoot is one thing, to have accidently killed the beast in the process is quite another. Camrose Rose considered himself many things: a broadcaster, a man of taste and opinion, a gastronome and a connoisseur of fine wine. The one thing he never thought he would self-identify as was a monster hunter. But sometimes fate has a way of deciding otherwise.

They say that every meal is an adventure and isn’t that just the offal truth. Sometimes you simply must engage the whole beast.

Take it from Camrose Rose, gourmet monster hunter. $2.99 on Kindle.

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