Unlocking the Ancient Instincts Behind Modern Love and Marriage

So, there I was, standing in the kitchen after yet another conversation with my wife and how she needed another pair of shoes. Does she need six pairs of nearly identical shoes (but they’re all for different “activities,” apparently), when I had an epiphany. It wasn’t just about shoes. It wasn’t just about purses. It was about… mammoth meat (Hunters and gathers). Yeah, that’s right. We’re all still cavemen and cavewomen deep down, and the things driving us today are eerily similar to what kept our ancestors going—except, instead of spears and caves, it’s credit cards and Amazon Prime.

My book, Mammoth Meat, came out of this exact realization. I’ve been married for over 34 years, and trust me, I’ve seen plenty of friends and colleagues navigate the rough waters of modern relationships (or, as I like to call them, “relationship rollercoasters”). But when I stepped back to analyze why we do what we do—date, marry, argue about leaving the toilet seat up—it hit me: we’re all just reenacting the same old caveman routines. The men are out there hunting for mammoth meat (now known as money, success, or whatever we think we need to survive), and the women are gathering—although today it’s not berries but rather shoes, purses, and clothes. Same instincts, fancier tools!

What started as me trying to make sense of my own marriage and why I’m better off not asking why she needs another pair of shoes, turned into a full-blown research project. I dived into Native American cultures of the early 20th century, watched movies, looked at relationships from around the world, and of course, analyzed the last 30 years of my friends’ love lives (don’t worry, names have been changed to protect the innocent… and the embarrassed). And you know what I found? Whether it’s a caveman hunting mammoth or a modern guy trying to land a promotion, the instincts are the same. The hunt never stops, and neither does the gathering.

So, if you’re wondering why you’re arguing over whether you need another set of throw pillows or why your spouse seems obsessed with upgrading their BBQ grill for the fourth time, just remember: it’s all in our DNA. We’re still living the caveman dream, only now we have Wi-Fi and smart phones.

Mammoth Meat is my humble attempt to explore why we behave the way we do in relationships, and trust me—it’s as much about humor as it is about heart. Because in the end, no matter how evolved we think we are, we’re all just a little caveman and cavewoman at heart. Happy hunting and gathering! $0.99 on Kindle.