Forget Having Kids. I’m Having Fun: 1000 Random Reasons I Chose to Be #ChildFree

“Forget Having Kids – I’m Having Fun” is a FUN book that examines all avenues of life and answers the question: Why Do So Many People Not Want Kids? Funny, extremely racy entertaining thought-provoking “Forget Having Kids. I’m Having Fun”
is a page-turner written in the vein of the classic tv show “Everybody Hates Chris”. It’s a wink-wink from the front cover to the last pages that will have parents and child-free people laughing and thinking about the cycle of life and how we arrive at making life’s biggest decision. This insight-filled book encourages positive self-care while challenging traditional ideas.”Forget Having Kids. I’m Having Fun” is a conversation starter. How you end that story is up to you

Chapters Include:

  • Chapter 1 The Vas Deferens
  • Chapter 2 Reason # 137 There’s Nothing a Kid Can’t Break
  • Chapter 3 Reason # 430 Because STFU
  • Chapter 4 Reason #45 But They Want to Travel Too
  • Chapter 5 Reason # 617 Everybody’s Got a Friend Named Mike
  • Chapter 6 Reason #122 I Don’t Want the Responsibility
  • Chapter 7 Reason #223 The Book of Brittany, Part 1
  • Chapter 8 Reason # 828 There’s Never a Good Time to Have Kids
  • Chapter 9 Reason #308 I’m Selfish and That’s Okay
  • Chapter 10 Reason #268 I Am Not a Role Model
  • Chapter 11 Reason # 33 Who’s Gonna Entertain Them?
  • Chapter 12 Reason #101 I Don’t Find Kids Interesting
  • Chapter 13 Reason #521 Jeffrey Dahmer Versus MLK
  • Chapter 14 Reason #71 Not All Kids Are Smart, Not All Kids Are Cute
  • Chapter 15 Reason #501 Kids Don’t Come with Instruction Manuals
  • Chapter 16 Reason #928 I Swore I’d Never Do Math Homework Again
  • Chapter 17 Reason #809 The Mom and Dad Bod
  • Chapter 18 Reason #315 I Can’t Always Protect Them
  • Chapter 19 Reason #806 I Don’t Need to Leave a Legacy
  • Chapter 20 Reason #6 Kids Have Cooties
  • Chapter 21 Reason #1 They Cost Too Damn Much
  • Chapter 22 Reason #620 When My Relationships End, I Want a Clean Break
  • Chapter 23 Reason #730 Anthony Bourdain
  • Chapter 24 Reason #911 The Book of Brittany, Part 2 $2.99 on Kindle.
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Free: Every Which Way But Home: Prequel to Mutt to Megastar series

Every Which Way But Home: Prequel to Mutt to Megastar series
Jolted from his cozy life on an ill-fated trip, Barney becomes a stray dog and is thrown into the unfamiliar world of the Dog Pound. Now he must use his wits and his ‘smarts’ to survive this hostile environment. Can he learn to use the system under the guidance of Charlie, an ancient scarred Blue Heeler who takes him under his paw? Or will it be “Bye, bye Cruel World” with Doc Soper’s needle? It’s the humorous, yet touching, prequel to Amazon Bestseller Reality Barks. Free on Kindle.
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Free: Riddle Me These & Riddle Me These, Kids — 2-Books-in-1: Over 300 Funny Brain Teasers Bundled for Smart Kids & Families to Play on Trips and Good Times Together

Riddle Me These & Riddle Me These, Kids -- 2-Books-in-1: Over 300 Funny Brain Teasers Bundled for Smart Kids & Families to Play on Trips and Good Times Together

If you want your child to develop problem-solving skills, then these two books combined are for you! If your child is gifted or bright it may be practically a must that you work together at solving puzzles, word games, and riddles, and Riddle Me This, Kids! can make such pursuits laugh-filled and effective. Have fun while you work out your grey cells together playing a simple game of Riddle Me This with the 300-plus brain busters bundled within this fun book. The advantages of working through these funny riddles will include helping:

Support your child’s problem-solving skill development
Guide and sharpen logical thinking in your offspring
Present challenges requiring your child to use every bit of his or her knowledge
Support critical thinking skills
Develop greater verbal ability and dexterity in your young ones
Better motivate your child in academic pursuits
Aid your kids to develop better concentration and focus
You enjoy something truly valuable, and memorable with your child!

Explore the funniest collection of riddles for ages 7 to 16, featuring family brain teasers, and fun for bright kids, with numbered riddles, and sometimes hilarious headings. This modest volume of more than 300 riddles ranges from the easy to the difficult brain teasers, and from the enjoyable to the downright irritating, What is more, our riddle-filled publication is designed to be ideal for gift giving, with numerous lavish illustrations!

As the subtitle of the first book here says, these puzzlers are challenging riddles for smart kids. It’s family fun for adults, and you will laugh at most of these riddles right along with your children. In addition they are numbered, with funny headings. Note that having them numbered means you will be able to return to the last one you worked on. Having good headings can help with that, too, but more importantly the heads can help furnish clues to the solution and lively commentary on the riddle at hand.
Don’t mess up by passing up this chance! That is, don’t make the mistake so many people do of merely intending to better develop a smart child’s mind, only to regret it after bad habits of mind have taken root. No one wants to fail to nurture a better future for their gifted child, but it happens. And it is so easily avoided! Doing things like taking the time to play riddles is one way you can be sure you won’t ever feel that you didn’t do enough.

The riddles in this volume might just help your child develop an inquisitive habit of mind, and a stick-to-it approach for solving problems. That may help more than you think, both at school and in later life. Best of all, the time spent together on these little puzzles may prove to be something you and your child will always remember fondly. So follow through to use it regularly and enjoy the fun on long drives and good times together! Free on Kindle.
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Fun & Quirky Classics: Short Stories by Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain and More

Sometimes life’s awkward or embarrassing; like when a small lie snowballs outs of control. Or you find a mouse in your pants on a train. Or a talking cat really ruins the mood at a dinner party. This book brings you funny, and witty short stories by 7 great writers from the 1800s and early 1900s. Authors include Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain, Stephen Leacock, Saki, O. Henry, W. W. Jacobs, and J. M. Barrie $0.99 on Kindle.
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Free: Massive in Lapland

Massive in Lapland
The third Alan and Frankie book – A Christmas novella.

Alan Rose gets the trip of a lifetime. The trouble is, it’s someone else’s lifetime. A trip to Lapland to see Santa’s grotto, the Northern Lights, oh and he is contracted to perform a couple of stand up shows to bemused Finns.
Pekka Pekkonen is Finland’s finest comedian, but he’s had enough of the limelight and wants out.
When Alan and Pekka meet, will they discover who really is Massive In Lapland? Free on Kindle.
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Encyclopedia of Dad Jokes

The Encyclopedia of Dad Jokes is packed full of hilarious dad jokes that will make you laugh… a LOT!! You’ll soon become the funniest person at home, work, the checkout line at the grocery store, and even the donut shop if you’re a police officer. It’s the best gift for any and every dad. Actually, for anybody who likes to laugh a lot. $4.99 on Kindle.
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Free: Celebrations

A joyous photo cartoon celebration of fun, zany cat and human holidays by two quirky calico cat sisters. The series is divided 5 books: Autumn Celebrations (October, November, December), Winter Celebrations (January, February, March), Spring Celebrations (April, May, June), Summer Celebrations (July, August, September) and “Celebrating All. Year Long” ( a compilation of all the fun holidays, January through December.). Whimsical, fun and entertaining reads for both children and adults – a purr-fact gift for that cat-loving friend. Or for you!

Free to $3.99 on Kindle.

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Free: Once Upon a Time in Holyrood

Once Upon a Time in Holyrood
In this outrageous sci-fi parody set in a futuristic Edinburgh twenty-four years after Scottish Independence, the five Bunnet sisters must make suitable matches before the family’s debts are foreclosed. It’s Pride and Prejudice, Jim, but not as we know it. Free on Kindle.
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The Goodbye Girls

The Goodbye Girls
The first client for two newbie funeral planners is a murdered biker. What could go wrong?

The Goodbye Girls takes you on an entertaining adventure through the trials of friendship and love—and will have you putting the fun in funeral. $0.99 on Kindle.
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Free: Halo Dolly

Halo Dolly

Joe LaFlam is back, and he’s up to his private eyeballs in conspiracies. The Spelunkers are back, too, but are they only puppets in the take-over-the-world game? And is Q real? Joe’s latest encounter with the infernal powers gives us the inside scoop on just about every conspiracy theory going, including Q, Q+, the Reptilians, nanobots, transhumanism, MedBeds, cerebral mesh, AI, chemtrails, the Deep State, CERN, portals, quantum computers, the metaverse, the multiverse, parallel earths, the alien invasion, Project Bluebeam, and HAARP. The world will soon discover that the insights gained on Joe’s journey are too valuable to miss.You need to read to believe. But more importantly, in the end will Joe finally get the girl? Free on Kindle.
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Free: The Royal Riposte: What If William and Kate Shared Their Truths With Oprah?

The Royal Riposte: What If William and Kate Shared Their Truths With Oprah?

It would never happen – or so we think – but is it really that unlikely?

We live in a world where Netflix makes lavish dramas about the current royal family, whilst Prince Harry and Meghan continue to indulge us with tell-all interviews, articles, upcoming biographies and documentaries.

So what if Oprah gave Kate and William the opportunity to tell their sides of the story and – against all the odds – they agreed?

This is the fictional transcripts of that unlikely, yet highly believable, event. Free on Kindle.
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Reality Barks: A Rescue Dog’s Funny Story

Reality Barks: A Rescue Dog's Funny Story
A rescue dog faces the reality of his unusual new life. Rescued before he was due to be euthanized and now a celebrity animal star, Elliott gives you a dog’s version of life, death and stardom. When two glossy Sydney metro couples rescue an ordinary Aussie mutt from the Dog Pound, he wonders why… especially when they change his name to Elliott! But he soon realizes that Jamie, the alpha-male of one of the couples, has plans for him… big plans! It’s a humorous Australian rescue dog’s tell-all tale about how he becomes a celebrity and wins their love.

$4.99 on Kindle.
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Free: Help! My Wife Has Become A Yoga Teacher

Help! My Wife Has Become A Yoga Teacher
Day in, day out, we all face a world full of strange people, peculiar rituals and businesses whose economic survival we cannot really understand. This book provides an account of one particular activity that the author learned about through his dear wife: yoga and especially its teacher community. During her journey from an enthusiastic practitioner to an actual instructor, he managed to collect a myriad of bizarre and often funny anecdotes, frequently witnessing them first-hand.

If you are looking for yet another book about the philosophy of yoga and recipes on how to do the best ‘Figure Four’ of your life, it is not for you. If you are instead interested in an honest account of how an outsider perceives a world that is largely strange to him, you might find what you are looking for. In case you also enjoy a healthy dose of sarcasm and spitefulness, you are in for a treat! With this in mind, engage your mula bandha (pelvic floor muscles), focus on your chakras (energy centres in the body) and start your journey. Free on Kindle.
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Gray Matters Volume 1

Gray Matters Volume 1
What’s so funny about life after 50? Jody will tell you in her collection of humorous short pieces, written Erma Bombeck style, that were originally published as a monthly humor column in a small-town newspaper. With the help of Internet sites, odd advice, and insights about the Baby Boomer generation Jody takes a wry, witty, self-deprecating look at the curiosities of aging. Almost everything is fair game; from her experiment of wearing red lipstick for a week, to her try at being a cougar, to her advice on what to do at 3 AM when you can’t sleep.

This anthology, broken up into 5 funny columns per volume, is targeted at America’s adult population. Everyone from 45-95 will enjoy this funny peek into their lives.
$0.99 on Kindle.
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An Accidental Royal Kidnap

An Accidental Royal Kidnap

A playful English comedy following the fortunes of London schoolteacher George Nearly, after he stumbles upon a princess on his living-room rug. Full of fun, quirky characters, witty one-liners and observations on modern life, it’s a royally funny novel! (Its sequel, ‘The Royal Wedding Saboteurs’, is also discounted to half price during the offer period.) $0.99 on Kindle.
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Free: My Neighbours Are Stealing My Mail

Alan Rose has quit his job and, much to his disappointment, moved in with his girlfriend, Rosie. But if only it was. Rosy, that is. You see, he’s not getting any mail. Convinced his neighbours are stealing it, he investigates. Only to find evidence of…witchcraft.
Meanwhile the Merton Palace Theatre is being renovated. As the building work continues, strange noises can be heard from the cellar. What have the builders unearthed?

Frankie Fortune is having strange dreams about the Merton Palace Theatre. Could it simply be flashbacks to when he died there in 1982, or is it something more sinister?

The crew of the cable TV show Scared Stiff are sent in to broadcast the strange happenings live on air.
What could possibly go wrong? Free on Kindle.
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Free: The Good Audit

The Good Audit

A true-to-life satire poking fun at the work, environment, and culture inside today’s largest public accounting firms (and really, the corporate office environment in general).

Titles matter more than real names and the team quickly discovers there is no such thing as a good audit. Will the team come together to get the job done or fall apart long before the artificially imposed deadline to finish? Free on Kindle.
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Free: Fore Play

Fore Play

Mandy Manville is expected to win the club’s Women’s Golf Championship, which will qualify her to tee it up with legendary golfers in Scotland’s Cialis Open. But when ex-college star golfer Jody Benson joins the club, Mandy’s beautifully manicured nails become claws as she stops at nothing to keep the newcomer from entering the tournament. Free on Kindle.
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Free: Scam A-Lama Hardball: A Dark Comedy Crime Caper

Scam A-Lama Hardball: A Dark Comedy Crime Caper
Legendary Aussie Rock Star Marc Charles thinks he’s found the opportunity of a lifetime when an overseas organization offers him a spectacular new album deal. But it’s a scam. Grab this thrilling, fast-paced humorous dark comedy with a subversive nail-biting plot twist, rock music, a love story, a rogue scammer, a legendary Aussie rock star, and a cast of crazy characters while it’s FREE. “Love it. I think Marc is a super cool character.” -Amazon 5-stars Free on Kindle.
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Free: Wagging the Dog: A Rescue Dog’s Funny Story

Wagging the Dog: A Rescue Dog's Funny Story
Celebrity dog Elliott fears he’ll be sent back to the Dog Pound when he is fired from his starring role as a pirate dog in the dog food TV Ad campaign. Will he end up being a one-hit wonder? You’ll laugh all the way as Elliott digs deep to learn some risky new skills and tricks, but can he save the day and his doggie career? The drama goes right down to the wire on a sunny, Aussie Christmas Eve. Free on Kindle.
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The Teleporter

The Teleporter
Booze, super heroes and comedy collide in this page-turning tale by best selling author Lee Hall $0.99 on Kindle.
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Scam A-Lama Ding Dong

Scam A-Lama Ding Dong

Rock star Marc Charles has to fight back to survive a mafia-like scam. He’s hounded by Cory Mariano, from a hostile Show Business organization. A wickedly dark comedy of deception, dodgy behaviour, celebrity, lies and love – and a huckster’s sly scheme to con the rock star. $0.99 on Kindle.
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Hacking George

Hacking George

Following a road-rage incident in which he was the victim, middle-aged cynic George Sanderson has an epiphany. He believes he has the power to influence fate and set the world to rights.

During a meticulously-planned intervention to help his friend Angela Hayworth, the two fall in love. George’s lonely existence looks set to improve. But he’s about to discover that playing games with people’s lives is fraught with danger. And when his life starts to fall apart, he’s forced to confront the frightening truth…

Someone is manipulating him. But why?
With his freedom and sanity at stake, George must fight for everything he holds dear – especially his lawn, his meat thermometer, and Angela’s perfect teeth.

“Not To Be Missed. If ever proof were needed that a good book doesn’t need a tortuously complicated plot, a high body count and gratuitous sex and violence then this is it.” – Reedsy Discovery $2.99 on Kindle.
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Reality Barks: A Rescue Dog’s Funny Story

Rescued before he was due to be euthanised, Elliott tells his story about his new oddball life when he becomes a Celebrity Time Share dog. Humorous, insightful and unexpectedly candid, this dog’s purpose is to entertain you. Told from the dog’s POV, Elliott gives you “ a dog’s version of life, death and stardom”.
$0.99 on Kindle.
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Swipe Right for Murder

Dating is tough. Especially if the guy you like might be a serial killer.

After a devastating heartbreak and a string of short-lived, failed relationships, college student Georgie Itoyama has now decided to approach dating in the same way that she approaches everything else: methodically, logically, and efficiently.

Georgie downloads countless dating apps, determined to find the love of her life as easily as she orders jeans online. And while her love-at-first-sight aspirations don’t exactly come true, she does find someone she likes. Quite a lot.

There’s only one problem. Girls are going missing at Georgie’s university, and all the signs are pointing to . . . him?

But that’s ridiculous. What are the chances that she’s dating an actual serial killer?

Then she matches with Nate. Mysterious, intelligent, and oddly fixated on solving the local disappearances. As Georgie’s relationships deepen with each of her guys, she unwittingly finds herself caught up in the mess that is murder, intrigue, and the nightmare of online dating.

Fast-paced, hilariously witty, and exhilaratingly suspenseful, Swipe Right for Murder explores the world of modern dating and all the “what-ifs” that come with it. $1.99 on Kindle
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